Friday, May 8, 2009

Uncontrolable

Here's the deal: There are times when I have extreme grumpiness that I have no control over. I know I am doing it and know I am acting ridiculous but just can't stop it. I over react at the littlest things. I hate the way I am acting at the time but it just happens. I never used to be like this. There are times when I really want to think I can blame it on the Rebif. I also could blame it on MS and still trying to deal with that.

Update: I feel as though my right side has gotten less numb and tingly. I'm not sure if this is because my right foot is so uncomfortable that I'm forgetting about the other annoying things happening. My foot still feels as though I am walking on golf balls. I feel like there is something stuck between my big toe and the next toe. My neurologist said to take 400-600mg. of IB Profin to help with the pain. I tried and it didn't help. He said to call on Monday if the pain was the same or worse.

There is a really good deal being offered at the local fitness and I've been debating about joining for the last week. I used to workout there a lot. When I got pregnant I was so exhausted I just quit and really have never thought I'd have the time to join again. My husband is very encouraging and telling me that even if I just went 3 times a month it would be worth the deal. I was thinking I could go Sat. and Sun. mornings and then one night a week. I really used to enjoy doing step and kickboxing classes. I'm just wondering about my foot and if I could do this. The attitude I had last night was F*CK MY FOOT! I really don't want this to control me and what I do. You also need to sign up for an 18 month membership. It's crazy for me to think about my life in 18 months. I'd like to think in 18 I'll be pregnant again. Then there definitely won't be time to go to the gym with two kids. I'm so torn as to join or not. AHHHHHHHHH!!! The whole getting pregnant thing is a whole other issue because of what is going on with me now.

Today I am grateful for wine.

No comments: